So you’ve finally decided to get a puppy, and suddenly everyone becomes a dog training expert.
You’ve probably heard…
“They need to grow up with another puppy,”
“You need to establish pack dominance and show them who’s boss,”
“You need to stick their nose in their own pee when they have accidents.”
The list goes on and on.
Here’s the problem: most of this advice will actually hurt your puppy’s progress.
And don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to shame the well-meaning friends and family giving this advice because, at the end of the day, they genuinely want to help.
But following outdated training myths is one of the fastest ways to sabotage the loving relationship you’re dreaming of with your new puppy.
Add in the overwhelming sea of conflicting information online, and it’s no wonder so many new puppy owners feel lost before they even begin.
You deserve better guidance. You deserve to know what actually works so you can skip the frustration and jump straight to building a strong, happy bond with your puppy.
So today, I’m breaking down one of the most damaging puppy training myths I hear—and giving you the science-backed approach that will set both you and your puppy up for long-term success.
The Myth: “Once a puppy has basic training skills, they have it for life”
This is something I hear way too often, especially from training clients I’ve worked with. And the reason is, it’s comforting.
If I told you that after training basic puppy skills like sit, stay, come, settle, etc., you didn’t have to put any more effort into maintaining those skills, you’d think that was a pretty sweet deal.
You could live the rest of your life knowing you didn’t have to put any more time and energy into honing these skills.
But that’s not how it works. Like any skill in life, you use it or you lose it.
I’ll use fitness as an example. You want to be fit and maintain your muscle mass? Guess what, you’ve got to continue to engage your muscles, strength train and eat right. There’s no easy way around it.
The same goes for puppy training.
If you want a well rounded, well behaved dog, you’ve got to give them every opportunity you can to reinforce their skill and grow. You’ve got to remind them of their abilities and build their ‘muscle memory’.
The Heartbreaking Reality
I want to share a tragic story from a dog owner who got a puppy from a breeder 3 years ago. I won’t mention the owner or breeder’s name out of confidentiality.
A breeder sends a puppy home with guidance and Baxter & Bella (which is an online puppy training course subscription).
The family starts teaching basic skills to the puppy, the puppy is starting to get it, and then training stops.
Life gets busy. Family grows. Priorities change. Things happen.
All of a sudden they have an out-of-control dog with severe anxiety and low threshold for any stress.
The now 3 year old out of control dog has to be rehomed. The dog goes through 3 rehomings before ending up with a behaviorist (thank goodness).
It sucks but this could have ended a lot worse for the dog. If in some crazy scenario, the dog couldn’t be rehomed (and the breeder wouldn’t have been able to take the dog back), the dog could’ve been sent to a shelter.
A dog with any aggression (even fear based aggression), severe behavior issues, and has already been rehomed several times, has very little options at this point.
Dogs like this will eventually be euthanized to save space for an ‘easier-to-handle’ dog.
This happens EVERY DAY and is another heartbreaking cause of why these well-bred dogs go to shelters or get euthanized.
If you’re reading this, I don’t want that for you or anyone for that matter.
The Three Ds: Your Key to Long-Term Success
So let me give you some advice on how to make sure that doesn’t happen to you.
My advice: Build it into your lifestyle.
There are three main ways you can build and maintain your puppy’s foundational skills: Duration, Distance, and Distraction.
1. Train Duration
Definition: The length of time a dog must hold a behavior or position before receiving reinforcement or being released
How to Build:
- Start with very short time periods (1-2 seconds for puppies)
- Gradually increase time incrementally
- Release them right before you think they may move—success!
- Build from seconds to minutes over multiple sessions
Example: Teaching a puppy to “stay” for 2 seconds, then 5 seconds, then 10 seconds, working up to several minutes.
2. Train Distance
Definition: The physical space between you and your dog while they perform a behavior
How to Build:
- Start very close to your puppy
- Start with a short distance away in order to keep your level of praise and reinforcement high, increasing the chances of success
- Gradually step back one foot at a time
- Remember, the farther you go, the lower your dog’s rate of reinforcement will be
Example: Teaching recall starting 3 feet away, then 6 feet, then 10 feet, working up to across-the-yard distances.
3. Train Distraction
Definition: Anything in the environment that draws the dog’s attention away from you, from a squirrel running across the yard to the sound of the doorbell
How to Build:
- Start with a small distraction and slowly build up to larger and more enticing ones
- Begin in quiet environments, then add mild distractions
- Start slow with something as simple as training in different rooms of the house, then the yard, then maybe the neighbor’s yard
- Progress to real-world environments
Example: Teaching “stay” in a quiet room, then with toys visible, then with people walking by, then at a busy park.
10 Everyday Training Opportunities for Puppy Owners
Building Duration, Distance, and Distraction into every skill can seem daunting, BUT it becomes easy when you find the little moments in your routine that allow you the opportunity to work on it.
1. Morning Coffee Routine – Building “Stay” Duration
The Scenario: You’re making your morning coffee and need both hands free
Training Opportunity: Have your puppy sit-stay while you prepare your drink, gradually increasing the time from 30 seconds to 3-5 minutes
Skills Building: Duration, impulse control, boundary respect
Progression: Start with short stays, add movement around the kitchen, then add the sounds of coffee brewing
2. Doorbell/Visitor Arrivals – Controlled Greetings
The Scenario: Someone comes to the door (delivery, guests, neighbors)
Training Opportunity: Practice “place” command on a designated mat while you answer the door
Skills Building: Impulse control, calm greetings, boundary training
Progression: Start with family members, progress to strangers, add duration of stay while door is open
3. Meal Preparation – Kitchen Boundaries
The Scenario: You’re cooking dinner and don’t want a puppy underfoot
Training Opportunity: Use “place” or “out of the kitchen” while you cook, rewarding calm behavior
Skills Building: Spatial boundaries, patience around food smells, impulse control
Progression: Start with simple tasks, build to full meal prep, add dropping food “accidents” as distractions
4. Walk Preparation – Patience Training
The Scenario: Getting the leash, putting on shoes, gathering keys
Training Opportunity: Puppy must sit calmly while you prepare, no jumping or spinning
Skills Building: Impulse control, calm excitement, routine awareness
Progression: Start with just touching the leash, build to full walk prep routine
5. Family TV Time – Settle Training
The Scenario: Evening family movie or show watching
Training Opportunity: Puppy learns to settle on their bed/blanket during screen time
Skills Building: Calm behavior, duration settling, ignoring distractions
Progression: Start with 15-minute segments, build to full movie length, add snack sounds/movement
6. Car Rides – Travel Manners
The Scenario: Running errands, school pickup, vet visits
Training Opportunity: Practice calm car behavior, proper entry/exit, waiting for permission
Skills Building: Travel etiquette, impulse control, real-world exposure
Progression: Start with car sitting in driveway, short trips, longer journeys with stops
7. Yard Time – Recall with Distractions
The Scenario: Letting puppy outside for bathroom breaks or play
Training Opportunity: Practice recall when they’re distracted by smells, sounds, or wildlife
Skills Building: Reliable recall, attention despite distractions, outdoor focus
Progression: Start in enclosed area, add natural distractions, practice during high-interest moments
8. Grocery Unpacking – Leave It Training
The Scenario: Bringing in groceries and putting them away
Training Opportunity: Practice “leave it” with bags, dropped items, and interesting smells
Skills Building: Impulse control, item discrimination, household safety
Progression: Start with boring items, progress to exciting foods, add duration and distance
9. Phone Calls/Video Meetings – Quiet Time
The Scenario: You need to take an important call or join a video meeting
Training Opportunity: Practice settling quietly nearby without interrupting
Skills Building: Duration settling, noise discrimination, attention management
Progression: Start with short calls, build to longer meetings, add doorbell/delivery distractions
10. Bedtime Routine – Crate/Bed Training
The Scenario: Family getting ready for bed, winding down for the evening
Training Opportunity: Practice going to bed on cue, settling in designated sleep area
Skills Building: Routine recognition, calm transitions, overnight settling
Progression: Start with short periods, build to full nights, add household noises and movement
Pro Tips for Success:
Start Small: Begin with 30-second successes rather than jumping to long durations
Reward Immediately: Mark the exact moment they succeed with praise or treats
Stay Consistent: Use the same cues and expectations every time
Build Gradually: Add one element at a time (duration OR distraction, not both)
MOST IMPORTANT PRO TIP!
End on Success: Always finish training moments with a win, even if small
The Truth About Maintenance
No one likes maintenance. Car maintenance. House maintenance. None of it sounds appealing. It’s the most boring part of having something to care for. But like all things, the boring maintenance tasks MATTER.
Think about it like this: you get the PRIVILEGE to care for an animal, you get the PRIVILEGE to teach your puppy skills and watch them grow, you get the PRIVILEGE to help them build their capacity. You get the PRIVILEGE to love them.
All relationships, furry or not, need some type of maintenance. If you want to continue having a good relationship with your dog or puppy, continue to teach them, continue to enforce boundaries, continue to help them work through their problem areas so they can:
- Have less anxiety and fear
- Have easier vet appointments
- Build emotional regulation for stressful moments
Life happens, but I encourage you to build a life that works for you. Build time to work on growing your puppy’s skills and it will be worth it!
